Tim Onion

Fox News Reporter Jacqui Heinrich: The way that it felt in the room was not good. It did not seem like things went well. And it seemed like Putin came in and steam rolled, got right into what he wanted to say and got his photo next to the president and then left

Some incredibly good news: One year ago this week, The Onion returned to print. In that one year, we’ve grown to the 13th largest print newspaper in the United States, just ahead of the Boston Globe, and growing fast. In short, it’s working. So… thank you. Thank you for helping save this thing.

The DC sandwich guy has been charged with assault for shouting at a CBP officer, throwing a sub into his chest, and then running off. "I did it. I threw the sandwich," he said while he was being processed.