Ed Burmila

Tapping the sign

Utah was the first state to allow open carry on campus. A would-be assailant could walk right onto campus armed as they please and nobody could’ve done a thing about it.

I don’t disagree with the point being made here, but also they do this like every three weeks. They were calling for Civil War about the Cracker Barrel logo.

Having already had Dynamite Hack, Stairway to Hogline, and Broom! Here Comes the Broom! rejected I will be withholding my talents from further debate over the selection of a team name for the Battle of the Bands-themed Bonspiel.

I’m not sure how much more evidence people need that simply being on Twitter and floating around in a tank full of Nazi sewage is causing a noticeable uptick in people who did not use to say Nazi shit out loud saying Nazi shit out loud.

Lockheed Lockheed Martin Marietta Lockheed Lockheed Martin Marietta Lockheed Lockheed Martin Marietta Do you like me? I guess...

The bootlegs have been around since forever, but for charity Dischord is releasing all the Albini demos for In on the Kill Taker, feat. the best version of Smallpox Champion known to man

Pitched a magazine that requires a physical query letter, so I wrote a letter and printed it and put it in the mailbox like some kind of historical reenactor.

Congratulations to our newest cabinet secretary for somehow finding a way to escape the life trajectory to which all previous humans named "Markwayne" have been limited (dying while trying to set a speed record in a boat painted to look like a pack of Marlboros)

Quick reminder that everyone already knows her replacement will be as vile and dead inside as she is. It's ok to just...savor these moments. Let yourself have it. Let everyone have it. This is joy, and it doesn't last long. Don't make it shorter.

An older generation of European tax exiles going wild on the group chats this morning, gloating from Monaco and Nevis.

Unemployable alcoholic, laborer in a furniture warehouse who came back from WWII smoking three-four packs a day and died before I was born.

There are many contenders here, but maybe the most depressing thing about being alive right now is that no one remembers anything that happened more than about a day ago. Blame what you want - social media, the internet writ large, AI - but a couple years ago might as well be the Middle Ages.