Sarah Cooper

I think the craziest thing about this Signal scandal is that by next week there’s gonna be something 10 times worse

When my dog is getting weighed I make sure to take off his leash, and I know he’d do the same for me

OLD MEN WITH DEATH WISHES SHOULDN’T BE IN CHARGE OF ANYTHING

Do you ever play a game with yourself where you try to predict what the comments are going to say before you read them and you’re always wrong

It feels like the more content there is to consume the more bored we become. Even after we find a new thing to watch we get sick of it so fast.

I wish Zelenskyy had just shown up in the same thing he wore last time

I feel like we’ve been about to be in a recession for the last 18 million years

I just found out that shares on truth social are called re-truths and I don’t think I’ll ever recover

I feel like I’d be good at writing silly fictional stories to go along with recipes in cookbooks

You know things are bad when this is who’s working for DoorDash now

I feel like every Hollywood studio has created a team of bots to go to their social media posts and comment “I am so sat”

I don’t recommend the Billy Joel doc unless you want River of Dreams stuck in your head forever

New dating headline: Take me to Fogo de Chão Brazilian Steakhouse bitch